Frozen, The Little Mermaid, and Other Coming Out Stories
Two and a half years ago, I sat in a movie theater with a friend and took in the words of the blonde cartoon queen in front of me: Don’t let them in, don’t let them see. Be the good [...]
What the Heck Does “Namaste” Mean?
I felt deeply skeptical as I followed my sister, a strong and limber yoga enthusiast, into a room that smelled of Patchouli. There were a lot of things that had deterred me from trying yoga. From everything I’d seen, it [...]
Assertiveness is an Act of Kindness
Assertiveness is an act of kindness. This is an idea I keep coming back to, again and again. It’s something I say at least once a week during a therapy session, and almost every time I do a speaking engagement, [...]
50 Shades of Black: My Float Tank Experience
Alarm rings. Shower, dress, food. Make some coffee to go. Grab your keys, endure traffic, arrive at work. Then calls, emails, meetings, emails about meetings, meetings about calls, lunch at your desk, paperwork, paperwork, paperwork. Keys, back into traffic, gym, [...]
Trump Anxiety in the Therapy Room
For the past six months, Donald Trump has been in my office. He’s there nearly every day, and he changes the energy in the room. And I think it’s about high time that I acknowledge him. I don’t mean, of [...]
How Your Secret is Damaging Your Relationship
“Sometimes when we think we are keeping a secret, that secret is actually keeping us.” -Frank Warren, owner of Postsecret.com Seeking Connection When you enter into an intimate relationship, you are seeking a deep, real connection with another person. I [...]
Risk Taking, Discomfort, and Personal Growth
When I was a child, my favorite summer activity was the two weeks I spent at Lazy J Ranch Camp, an eclectic summer retreat in the hills of Malibu. Lazy J had the traditional array of summer camp activities: archery, [...]
The Monster at the End of Your Book
When I was a young child, one of my favorite bedtime stories was The Monster at the End of This Book. It opens with Sesame Street muppet Grover who, having read the title on the front of the book, explains [...]
10 Foolproof Ways to Find Unhappiness
No one ever comes to a therapist saying, “I’d like to be less happy,” but a lot of people make choices that lead to unhappiness. Having seen this in action, I’d like to share with you the following list of [...]
What kind of machine are you?
My very first car was a 1995 Chevy S-10 pick-up truck. I was in college at the time, knew nothing about cars except that I needed one, and my friend was selling his. We exchanged cash for car title, and [...]